Meet Raynn: New Music, Queer Experience and Pinoy Pride

By Caydie Tampac

Photography By Stefan Jasić

Raynn’s little sister, Kaeko, moved away from their home in Las Vegas. After spending their entire lives together, she flew all the way to Singapore. This was the first time they were forced to be separated, much less be over a thousand miles apart. 

Overcome by grief at their sister’s absence, they wrote and recorded the lyrics of an unreleased song through heaving sobs in Kaeko’s vacant bedroom, “Fallen star / Back of the car / You wept / All for the blood she spent to turn into this,” with the chorus, “Blood / Your tissues / You know I miss you / Crying in your own bedroom.”

Raynn’s songs carry the memories that they hold dear to their heart as a means of connection with their loved ones. They note their difficulty in expressing their emotions.

“It’s hard for me to tell someone how I feel straight up. I’ve never been that kind of person, and I want to be that kind of person.” 

For Raynn, they express themself more creatively through writing songs. Despite the agony that they had endured, Raynn plans to release it along with many other original songs. They look back on when they shared it with Kaeko and their other sister, Kiyoko, all of them crying together. 

“I think my music, to me, has always been a way to express my feelings in the most genuine way possible,” Raynn says, “to where I don’t have to actually hide anything and I can truly be myself with zero fear, y’know?”

Born in the Philippines and currently residing in Las Vegas, Raynn, or also known as Ray, is an indie singer-songwriter and producer. Their soft, yet powerful voice uses complex techniques while still sounding effortlessly light and graceful. 

Raynn has a diverse discography with songs ranging from the soft melodies in “Mr. Stronomy” to the resonant bass behind “Black Sea”, and their music is ever-changing. 

Raynn’s songwriting began at the age of 12 while living in Los Angeles. With an interest in poetry, they translated their poems into songs. This paved the way for Raynn’s distinct style of lyricism. They draw their inspiration from their own feelings and experiences, particularly how they feel towards certain people, themself or a situation.

”Sometimes I write a song about one singular happenstance,” they share, “or if I’m feeling really strongly about someone, I will write a full album.”

When reminiscing on their past projects, an unreleased song comes to Raynn’s mind as their favorite. Titled “It Begins to Rain”, the song encapsulates the experience of solitude. They share how throughout their life, they haven’t had many friends or a proper relationship with their family.

For Raynn, the song captures the feeling of dying. “When you’re about to die, and you know the world is about to just not really be there anymore, like it’s about to give up. You’re about to give up.”

“It Begins to Rain” holds their favorite lyrics that they have ever written. It details people around them offering words of encouragement to abandon the negativity crowding their mind. Even so, Raynn counters that nothing can save them from their own feelings of despair. Raynn’s lyrics have elements of darkness and seclusion, as in the lines, “Water drains out of my cavities / These old dreams, nothing special to me suddenly,”

”You’re just this husk of something that was. But you’re not that anymore and you’re dead,” Raynn said when detailing their love for dark themes within their songs. “I love water draining out of your cavity. You’re just dying, you know?”

In many of Raynn’s more recent musical projects, they spotlight the acceptance of their queer identity. The songs depict the queer experience of falling in love in ways they didn’t expect. For a majority of their childhood, they’ve been taught to repress and be ashamed of their identity. As they grew more aware of their true feelings, they began to fear how those around them might react, “Am I supposed to be feeling this, but can I feel this way? What are the people that I know gonna say about me feeling this way?” 

Songwriting has become a meaningful space for Raynn to fully embrace being queer and write about the people that they have fallen for. To unapologetically express who they truly are.

Raynn smiles, “I really like the songs writing about that experience and about the people that I’ve been feeling that towards, all the people I’ve fallen for. ‘Cause it’s got me to write some really good songs.”

Their lyrics not only represent who they are as a person, but also the events in their life that have shaped them. There have been heavy moments during the songwriting process where Raynn has had to trudge through rampant rivers of emotion. Songwriting has become an essential expression of their soul, for them to “let my feelings out in a way that I could articulate.”

”If I want to let you know that I cherish you as a person, I will open the door for you.”

In other aspects of Raynn’s life, they share their love for their home country, the Philippines. There is a certain freedom that Raynn felt, as they reminisced about exploring nature as a kid; getting messy in the rain, climbing trees, catching birds and spider fights. 

They grew up with leaky tin roofs and walked to school in chest-high water while wearing a rain-soaked uniform. Despite the hassles, Raynn felt the strong compassion and care that everyone had for each other. They could trust in the uncles, aunts, grandpas and grandmas all around them, even if they had never met before.

”In the Philippines, it’s like everyone’s just living, but we’re all living together. It doesn’t feel isolated. Everyone feels like family.”

Aside from their sisters, the rest of their family plays a significant part in their life. Especially their mother, who has supported Raynn every step of the way throughout their career and as a parent, and Raynn wishes for their mother to continue being by their side.

“I love my mom to death. No matter what happens in my life, I just want her to be there somehow, some way.”

For listeners of Raynn, they express their gratitude and surprise at the support that they have gathered over the years of performing as an artist. Raynn has encountered several fans who share how their music has helped them through dark times.

From the moment that they first began songwriting, they never expected to gain a wide audience throughout the world, and it has overwhelmed them with appreciation.

“I hope that those people will stay listening to my music for a while, because y’all got a lot to listen to, especially in the future. Thank you.”

Raynn hopes their fans gain the confidence to fully embrace who they are without regret through their music, that the person they are or the feelings they experience are nothing to be ashamed of.

Having felt out of place in the world themself, Raynn conveys the feeling of alienation and loneliness that many listeners find solace in.

”You’re not, y’know, a freak, you’re not a monster, you’re not a weirdo,” Raynn stresses, “and even if you’re a weirdo, hey, I’m a weirdo, too. Y’know, we’ll be weird together.”

In the future of Raynn’s music, they reveal a great deal of new songs to be released when they are least expected. “I’m not gonna do any advertising. I’m literally just gonna drop them, like no word, no nothing.” They also reveal that their image will undergo a massive rebrand as a faceless persona as they focus more on their music. 

“I hope that especially when I release my music, I can feel even less fear and less judged for who I am as a person and for what I stand for,” they share, “and I hope that, y’know, that’s a good change in the world.”

Raynn is available to listen to on Spotify, YouTube and Apple Music. 

Edited By: Malory Shaw